Интервью

OK! Weekly, #5, June 1996

Перевод на русский язык

Interview by Garth Pearce

Why I Still Grieve For River

By Samantha Mathis

The Broken Arrow star talks for the first time about her feelings for River Phoenix, her lover at the time of his tragic death.

Samantha Mathis followed her boyfriend River Phoenix as he staggered out of a Hollywood nightclub and crouched on the cold pavement. She held his head as he slipped into unconsciousness.

Actor River, just 23, never recovered. He died within an hour of being taken to Cedars-Sinai Hospital, Los Angeles. Despite a supposedly clean-living lifestyle, he died from a lethal drug overdose.

Since then, Samantha has remained silent about the harrowing events of that fateful Halloween night of October 1993 and the effect it has had on her life. She has simply got on with her acting career, with appearances in films like Little Women, Jack and Sarah and The American President, while keeping a low personal profile and steering clear of interviews.

She is rarely seen out socializing and has never been back to The Viper Rooms, the trendy nightclub owned by Johnny Depp on Sunset Boulevard where River Phoenix was taken ill.

But at 25, as her film career takes another leap forward, with a major role in Broken Arrow with John Travolta and Christian Slater, Samantha has at last decided to talk about her memories of the night River died and the emotions that remembrance provokes.

"I certainly look back on the night he died as a nightmare," she says frankly. "It is a nightmare that will never end. He had gone to the club simply to play his guitar and enjoy himself, but his life at the time seemed under so much pressure."

"He had a lot of work and it seemed to get to him. He took the problems of the world on his shoulders and could not seem to shake off black moods of depression."

"But he never wanted to die. It was so far from his mind and, together, we shared a loving, caring life. Sadly, there is a feeling among some people in Hollywood that they are somehow invincible. Like them, River began to think that nothing could touch him."

"To a certain extent, his sudden illness and death that nigh will always be surreal for me. I still can't believe it. I spent a year thinking about it -- a terrible year, and the loss is one of those things which, even now, is very hard to accept."

Her slight frame, with brown hair cut neatly to shoulder length, looks so different from her on-screen image in Broken Arrow. She plays action girl Terry Carmichael, who befriends stealth bomber pilot Riley Hale (Christian Slater) in his attempts to expose rogue pilot Vic Deakins (John Travolta). We see her character shooting, fighting and scheming to beat Deakins, who has stolen nuclear weapons in an attempt to blackmail the American government.

But Samantha's fighting in the last to years has been of an altogether different kind. "River's death was a life changing experience for me," she says. "We all know that when anyone dies, it makes us look at life differently. Seeing someone so young and loving and full of life crumble and dies changed all my priorities. You know, it made me see what is really important and what isn't. Ultimately, I have really had to learn to laugh at life, too. Otherwise, it can all become too much."

Samantha, who co-starred with River in The Thing Called Love in 1993, knew that his performances in films like Stand by Me and My Own Private Idaho had set him up to earn recognition as ‘the new James Dean'. Dean died in 1955 in a car crash after starring in just three films and is still remembered as a tragic genius whose promise was never fulfilled. But of River, who was set to star alongside Tom Cruise in Interview with the Vampire, Samantha has more pragmatic memories.

"He had time for every problem and every possibility,' she says, "but I have learned to be much more selfish in my outlook. I am selfish about my time and who I spend it with. I am also selfish about my work and which films I choose to work on."

"And if I don't want to do something, I never criticize myself for not doing it. I take care of myself and my needs, because life is too short. I do not do anything because I have to."

Since River's death, Samantha has spent time backpacking with her friend, actress Sandra Bullock -- who is now one of Hollywood's hottest actresses, earning $5 million for her latest film, A Time to Kill -- and she has been very cautious about starting a new romance.

"Working as I do makes things complicated. I can leave town for four months at a time, and it is impossible to keep a male friendship moving forward with such long gaps. So I have decided to leave things alone."

"I have recently started seeing someone a little, though," Samantha admits, showing signs that she is gradually getting over losing River. "He is from New York. It is really very new and it's not anywhere near a relationship yet. But it's a start."

It's obvious that, although the words flow surprisingly freely for someone who has chosen not to say anything on the subject until now, Samantha is still bruised and fragile over River's sudden death.

"I think of him every day," she says simply. "It's strange to see him through his films, still living and breathing. I put on the television at the weekend and I Love You to Death was on, and there he was. I'm grateful to be able to see him like that, but at the same time it is very odd and I'm never quite sure how to explain my emotions."

Broken Arrow offered her a valuable chance to forget the past. "I needed to do an action film, where I could put my emotions to one side," she confesses. "I enjoyed learning how to shoot a gun, and it was very confidence-building to be able to pull off a few stunts. There was an element of fear and exhilaration."

It also gave her an opportunity to work with 26-year-old Christian Slater again, who was her co-star six years ago in Pump up the Volume and, ironically, the man who replaced River on Interview with the Vampire.

"It is hard to remember where I was at 19," she says, rather sadly. "I have had a ton of experience since then and gained more confidence -- at a terrible price, of course."

"I am pretty much at peace about River now. But it is still strange. I have a feeling it always will be."

© 1996 OK! Weekly.
Thanks to http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/4347/ for this text.

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